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Coaching from the Sidelines


I often hesitate to share articles such as these, as I know all parents are not offenders and I don't want anyone to feel accused. I decided to share this article as it was sent to our office by one of your fellow Cobb Atlanta parents who found it a good read and I found it a good one for my own parenting as well. I like to believe CAJ parents act by our motto of coaches coach, players play, and parents cheer. I do know that as parents our emotions can get the best of us and we want to correct our children from the sidelines. Please know this article isn’t directed at anyone in particular. As a parent, I'm right there with you watching my own boys wishing they would cut a little harder or hit the jump at the wakeboard park. Hopefully, this article will help you and me think twice before saying more than "Great Job!" or "You got the next one!" from the sidelines.

All the best,



The original article can be found here.

Why Coaching From the Sidelines Will Always Backfire for Sports Parents

Parents' Reaction To Failure Translates To Their Children

Parents' Reaction To Failure Translates To Their Children

With tournaments just around the corner, this message is a great reminder for parents on how to help your daughter deal with defeat or failure.


PCA National Advisory Board Member Carol Dweck is the Lewis and Virginia Eaton Professor of Psychology at Stanford University and author of Mindset: The New Psychology of Success. She graduated from Barnard College in 1967 and earned a Ph.D. from Yale University in 1972. She taught at Columbia University, Harvard University, and the University of Illinois before joining the Stanford faculty in 2004.

In this clip, Dweck explains that the way adults react to failures, whether their own or their children, will transmit to their child's mindset about how they should handle failure. She states that parents need to address it, and not ignore by "treating it as a natural part of the process, and together, learning from it."

Click here for the PCA article.

5 Ways to Ruin Your Child’s Season

5 Ways To Ruin Your Child’s Season

 The Art of Coaching Volleyball

Original post: https://www.theartofcoachingvolleyball.com/5-ways-to-ruin-your-childs-se...


  By Peter Ogle

 Parents, even well-meaning moms or dads, can often do more harm than good while trying to help their children excel at sports. Here are 5 things you should never do when your son or daughter is playing on a youth sports team.


1. Continually tell them that the coach is deficient.

2. Say things to them throughout the season like, “Your coach is not seeing the real you,” referring to the fact that you are a better player/leader/assistant coach than they are giving you credit for.

3. Tell them that the coach is using them the wrong way – wrong position, wrong time, etc.

4.Take it upon yourself to teach skills in a way that is distinctly different than the way the coach is teaching them, or hire a private coach to work with your child without the knowledge and cooperation of the team’s coach.

5. Tell your child, “The coach doesn’t like you. It must be personal.”


What Makes A Nightmare Sports Parent -- And What Makes A Great One

What Makes A Nightmare Sports Parent -- And What Makes A Great One

By: Steve Henson 

Original post: http://www.thepostgame.com/blog/more-family-fun/201202/what-makes-nightmare-sports-parent


Hundreds of college athletes were asked to think back: "What is your worst memory from playing youth and high school sports?"

Their overwhelming response: "The ride home from games with my parents."

The informal survey lasted three decades, initiated by two former longtime coaches who over time became staunch advocates for the player, for the adolescent, for the child. Bruce E. Brown and Rob Miller of Proactive Coaching LLC are devoted to helping adults avoid becoming a nightmare sports parent, speaking at colleges, high schools and youth leagues to more than a million athletes, coaches and parents in the last 12 years.

Those same college athletes were asked what their parents said that made them feel great, that amplified their joy during and after a ballgame.

Their overwhelming response: "I love to watch you play."

There it is, from the mouths of babes who grew up to become college and professional athletes. Whether your child is just beginning T-ball or is a travel-team soccer all-star or survived the cuts for the high school varsity, parents take heed.

The vast majority of dads and moms that make rides home from games miserable for their children do so inadvertently. They aren't stereotypical horrendous sports parents, the ones who scream at referees, loudly second-guess coaches or berate their children. They are well-intentioned folks who can't help but initiate conversation about the contest before the sweat has dried on their child's uniform.

In the moments after a game, win or lose, kids desire distance. They make a rapid transition from athlete back to child. And they’d prefer if parents transitioned from spectator – or in many instances from coach – back to mom and dad. ASAP.

Brown (pictured below at podium), a high school and youth coach near Seattle for more than 30 years, says his research shows young athletes especially enjoy having their grandparents watch them perform.

"Overall, grandparents are more content than parents to simply enjoy watching the child participate," he says. "Kids recognize that."

A grandparent is more likely to offer a smile and a hug, say "I love watching you play," and leave it at that.

Meanwhile a parent might blurt out …

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